


The World We Both Exists

by ryzenxhie



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Existence, Fluff and Angst, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, Imagination, KageHina - Freeform, M/M, Sad, Timeskips, ryzenxhie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:16:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27205109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryzenxhie/pseuds/ryzenxhie
Summary: "why are you like that? You're not even trying your best""why are you so good? You think you're cool just because you're better than us?""Oh, you're so ugly! I won't ever want to be with you!""You look so appealing! I'm sure you get some face job. "Wherever I go, those are the words I always hear. If you're not good or beautiful, they'll judge you. If you're good or beautiful, they'll still judge you. Everything about you, judgement is always there smashing your self-esteem. What do they really want me to be?I isolate myself from everyone. It'll be much better to just be alone than to be with this disgusting society. In the end, this isolation.. it took everything I want from me.. I don't know where I even belong anymore. Wherever I go, there will always be judgement, a price to pay to be surrounded by people. No one appreciated my company, but luckily, I found you.Whenever I'm with you, I find peace. Whenever I'm with you, I'm free. Whenever I'm with you, I'm myself. You're all I need in this world we live in.In this world, there's only one place that I belong and it only exists when I'm with you.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	The World We Both Exists

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is ryzenxhie and this is my first ever story here in ao3. I'm not good at English so please bear with me. Expect grammatical errors and typographical errors in the story. Advance sorry for that. I hope that this story won't disappoint you. Thank you.

"You're still here? Why? No one wants you to stay"

I act like there's no one talking to me as I passed by them. I'm already used to it because I always hear the same word every day for the past 18 years of my life. Nothing's new.

"Mom! I'm home!" I shout as I enter the door. I expect to be greeted by her but I realized that she's no longer with us. It's only me, and my sister. 

"Tobio! You arrived a minute earlier than usual"

"That's not surprising at all. Is your husband here?" 

"Apparently, he is on a business trip for a week. If you don't mind, can you buy me these things in the nearby grocery?"

I sighed as I accept the paper she's holding. My mother and my sister are the only people who really care for me. Even though I really want to sleep because I'm tired, I can't say 'no' to my sister.

"Are you tired? If you're tired just rest, I can by those things on my own" she said. She was about to take the paper on my hand but I quickly move it far from her.

"I'm fine. I'll buy those things, just wait for me."

"If you say so. Be attentive bro, stay safe."

I nod before walking upstairs to change my clothes. After I change my clothes, I quickly go down and get out of our house.

While walking on the street, I notice that there are only a few people on the road. Maybe it's because the weather forecaster said that heavy rain will arrive this afternoon. But even though there are only a few people, I can't stop overthinking.

_They're maybe judging me because I'm not smiling._

_They're maybe judging me because of how I look._

_They're maybe judging me because of my clothes._

I can't stop overthinking what are people talking about me until I heard a loud and repeatedly beeping of car. I look in front of me and I was so shocked that a truck was approaching. I thought that it will bump at me so I closed my eyes but to my surprised, I feel myself slowly taking by the gravity.

"What the hell are the two of you doing?!" I heard a man shout. "If you want to die then choose another truck to be hit on! I have a family that waiting for me to come home you stupid brats!"

I slowly open my eyes as I heard the engine of the car. I see the truck's already leaving and some people are looking at me. I can see in their eyes that they're really concern about me, but who am I for them to be concerned?

I quickly stood up and was about to leave when I heard a cursed behind me

"Shit! It's bleeding fuck."

I quickly look behind me and there I saw a person with orange hair lying on the floor I was lying earlier. I saw his knees are bleeding and his eyes are teary.

Now, I clearly understand why I suddenly fall when I was about to be hit by the truck. The guy's lying in front of me pushed me.

"What? After I save your life you will just stare at me? Is this a new way of saying thank you to your savior?"

I keep staring at him as he helps himself to get up. He was about to stand when he suddenly loses his balance. Out of reflexes, I extend my arm to support him.

"T-thank you hehe"

"Where do you live?"

"huh"

"I'm asking you where do you live?"

"Oh, I'm just new here in this city hehe. I'm actually finding an apartment where I can live for at least a year."

I sighed. If there's no place he can go, there's only one solution that I know.

* * *

"Tobio? You're already ba-oh! Who's with you?"

"Uhmm, I almost died but these tangerine save me." as I said those words to my sister, I can clearly feel that the little tangerine is already glaring at me.

"What?! YOU ALMOST DIE??! My God, Tobio! How many times do I have to tell you that-"

"I know, I know. But treat his wound first. I'll get the first aid kit."

I saw my sister sighed as she accompanies the man who "save" me. I saw them sit on the couch when I'm walking towards our kitchen to take the first aid kit.

* * *

"I'll talk as I treat this wound, is that okay?" my sister asks the little tangerine.

"It's fine ma'am! I don't mind," the tangerine said full of joy. How I wish I can smile like that too.

"Don't call me ma'am. Miwa is fine."

"So what's your name? And how old are you?"

"I'm Hinata Shoyo! I just turned 19 this year."

"Ohh, Tobio's turning 19 too this coming December!" both of them suddenly look at me so I suddenly look at our window. I don't know why but I kinda feel shy.

"So where do you live? Are you from this city?"

"Actually no. I'm just new here in this city! I actually go here for my studies."

"I was about to ask that." my sister giggles so this tangerine. "So where are you staying? Do you have any relatives here?"

"Actually, that's my problem ma-Miwa. I don't know anyone here in this city and I don't know where to stay."

"Ohh, if that's the case then you can stay here with us. We have 2 more extra rooms here where you can stay."

"Is that true?" the tangerine asks and his eyes look sparkling.

"Of course honey."

"Don't worry Miwa! I'll find a job so I can pay."

"If you said so. You can go find with my brother, I bet he knows a lot of places."

"Yeah, but it looks like he doesn't want to."

I suddenly feel that something hit on my legs and I saw my sister kicking me. I raised my eyebrow to tell her I'm mentally asking _what_ and then she suddenly talks.

"You won't mind finding a job with Hinata, right?" she asks as her eyes widened. She's mentally saying that I don't have a choice so I just nod repeatedly.

I love my sister but sometimes, she's very annoying especially when she's forcing me to do something that I don't like or whenever she's treating me like I'm still a baby.

* * *

"I'll stay here. The first room was much bigger, it feels so lonely." the tangerine said as I show him the room just in front of my room.

I nod and when I was about to enter my room, he suddenly talks. "Are you sure that it's fine for you to help me find a job?"

I look at him as I say, "It is really not, but don't mind it."

He suddenly laughs and I don't know why. But honestly, his laugh is a kinda good thing to see. It is very pure.

"What are you laughing at?"

"You"

"Huh? Why me? Did I said something funny?

"No, not at all. Maybe my sense of humor is just fucked up." he said while still laughing. I shake my head repeatedly as I try to hide my smile.

"Oh! You're smiling?

"No."

"Yes! You're smiling!"

"No, I'm not."

He suddenly burst into laughter again and I join in. There's nothing funny about it but his laugh just make me laughs too.

"Nice to meet you, Kageyama Tobio." he said with a smile. My heart race so fast. This is the first time I see someone smile at me this pure.

"Nice to meet you too, Hinata Shoyo."

* * *

The next morning is completely different from my usual morning. Every day, I used to eat alone in the dining area and since it's weekend, all I have to do is to stay at home and do nothing. But today, I'm not alone in the dining area. I'm with someone who greeted me with a smile plaster on his face.

"Goodmorning Kageyama! Did you cook all of these?" he asks as he pulls the chair beside me.

"Yup."

"Oh, so you know how to cook too huh? By the way, where's your sister?"

"Work, or probably at my aunt's house."

"Ohh..."

Silence took over the place but I don't feel lonely or awkward at all. I usually like silence but this silence is much better than my usual silence.

Hinata finished his food first. I thought he will leave me alone there but I was wrong. He didn't leave his place and he started talking again.

"So, uhm. The food was great!" he said and I laugh. "Hey! Why are you laughing?! I just compliment the food you cooked!"

"You obviously don't know what to say." I said and he looks away. I just shake my head and continue eating my food.

"I have many things I wanted to say but, I'll save it for later."

"So why aren't you leaving yet? You're waiting for me to finished eating or sum?"

"Yeah, it's so lonely to eat alone."

"You don't need to worry. I used to eat alone every day."

"Why?! Even at your school?" he asks as his eyes widened because of shock. I nod as an answer.

"Why? You don't have any friends?" he asks again but I choose not to answer. I heard him sighed. "Maybe you don't have. Look at you, you're always frowning. People are probably intimidated at you."

"Well, I will rather be alone than to be with someone who doesn't like. No one likes me so yeah, I'm really alone."

"What??? You're definitely not alone right now! You have me, hello? Do I look like a ghost to you?

"No. You look like a small tangerine to me." I saw how he glared at me so I just laugh.

"Maybe I'm a tangerine in your eyes but this tangerine will never leave you until I'm here."

* * *

It's just 10 in the morning when we arrived at the coffee shop where I used to work. The staff greeted me with a smile but I choose to ignore them. I remember that time where I'm still working here and they're just talking bad about me to the manager. Good thing that the manager here knows how to learn the truth first before believing some rumors.

"Tobio! It's been 2 years since I last saw you! You grow huh?" the manager greeted me as he saw me walking towards him.

"And you grow backward, Sugawara." he laughs.

"So what brings you here? Do you like to work here again? It's fine with me."

"Actually yes, but this person needs a job more than I need it." he looks behind me as I point Hinata who's hiding at my back. He's not totally hiding, it's just that he's so small so he can't be seen if he's standing behind me.

"Hi!" Hinata greeted the manager.

"Oh! What a cute kind of species! You sure you can work already? Aren't you a minor?"

"I'm already 19 years old, sir. Here's my biodata." Suga reached out to the envelope that Hinata was holding. He gets the paper inside and read it using his eyes.

"Oh, so you're from another city I see. Well, you look nice and I see that you have experience. I'll gladly accept you as one of my workers."

"Really sir? Thank you so much. I'll try my best so I won't disappoint you."

"Goodluck, Hinata. And don't call me sir, Suga is fine." the manager said with a smile before looking at me. "So how about you, Kageyama? You want to work here again?"

"I want to, again. Is that alright?"

"You're not others to me, Kageyama. I'm happy to accept you here at my shop again.

* * *

"So you already worked there?" Hinata asks as we walk at the park. Since it's too early to come home, he asks if I can show him around our city.

"Yeah. But as you can see, I'm not that sociable so I decided to quit." we sat on a bench under the tree as we continue talking.

"Oh, I see. But why do you decide to work again?"

"Hmm, maybe because I need money?"

"Everyone does, Kageyama." I laughed because his tone is different than usual. It looks like that I'm done with him.

"Well, I don't know. Maybe I want to see you suffer?"

"Huh? Beats me! I start working since I was 6 years old so my body already master all the movements!" he said while flexing his small biceps. I just laughed again.

"You want to buy ice cream?" I ask and he stops talking. He looks at me as his eyes narrowed.

"Why? You'll buy me an ice cream?"

"No. Buy it yourself." I straightly said and he suddenly punches my arm.

"I hate you! I thought you gonna buy me some that's why you ask!"

I laughed again as I see how disappointed he is and he continues to punch my arm. I'll honestly say that he's cute.

* * *

Monday comes so fast and I need to go to school again. I really have no plans to attend school today but my sister opposes the idea. She said that it's already Christmas break next week, I don't have to go to school for at least a month so why waste a day?

As I enter our classroom, all eyes were on me. People usually wonder why all the people looking at them but this is how they greet me every day so I don't really care. I quietly walk towards my seat and to my surprise, I saw Hinata there.

"Ohh! Is this your seat? Sorry I don't know."

"What are you doing here?" I ask as I sit down in my place.

"Stop frowning. That's why people don't like to be with you, you always look mad."

"I don't care whether they like me or not, I can still stay alive even I'm alone. So I'm asking you, why are you here? I thought I see you at the house earlier."

"I don't want to stay alone. And don't worry, it's fine. I'm just auditing this class." he said and smile purely again. I just sighed as I shake my head. He can be serious.

The entire day was quite normal because I can still hear that people around me are talking about me but the difference is, they're talking about why I'm with someone that's not from this school. They might also think that someone really talks and smiles at me, at Kageyama Tobio who's entire 18 years of existence, no one dare to talk.

"Why are they looking at us like that? Is there something wrong with me or what?" Hinata confusedly ask.

"There's definitely nothing wrong about you. The only wrong here is why-" I was interrupted when someone appears in front of us. He quickly looks at me before looking to Hinata.

"H-hi! Are you a new student here?" the guy asked. He acts like the small tangerine is the only person in front of him.

"Uhm, no. I'm just auditing a class."

"Ohh, that's why." I saw how Hinata slowly frown.

"That's why what?"

"If you're aware of the presence of the person behind you, you maybe get into trouble." the guy straightly said as if I can't hear him.

"And why is that?"

"Because he's an outcast here. No one dares to talk to him nor to go near him. People say he was cursed." I can't help but laugh at the guy's statement. How rude. I'm clearly in front of him and he still talk about me being a _"cursed"_

"Uhm, excuse me? You're really saying that in front of him?" I can feel that this tangerine can't believe what he just heard.

"In front of who?" the guy asked as if he really can't see me.

"Wow, how rude of you. First of all, I don't care if this person behind me, whom you can't see, is cursed of what. Second, who are you to meddle about my life decision? Third, he's clearly existing. He deserves to be seen. And lastly, I don't want to talk to people like you who knew nothing but to bully others who's weaker or doesn't care about your shits. Get lost, please? It is irritating to see your face"

The guy's face suddenly become unexplainable but he recovers from being shock by what Hinata just said. His shock mouth suddenly turns into a smirk.

"I see, both of you are just trash. Stay vibing." he sarcastically said as walk away from us. He purposely bumped Hinata's shoulder.

"What a jerk. Is that normal here in your school? Wow, the saying _"don't judge the book by its cover"_ is applicable to the student here. All of them are just a wolf dressed as sheep."

"You just let that guy say what he wants. It's normal for me." he's completely shocked face make me shock too as he turns around to see me.

"What the heck? They're all really like that?" he asks and I nod. "What the freaking fuck, Kageyama Tobio! You're just letting them treat you like shit?"

"Hey! Your words!"

"I'm so sorry, but still, what the fuck?"

"Can you please calm down? It's not like you are the one who's getting those treatments."

"Even though-"

"But because of what you did earlier, their treatment for you might become the same as mine."

"I don't care about them. Remember what I said? As long as I'm here, I will never leave you."

* * *

Weeks past by faster than usual, maybe it's because I have someone who's entertaining me and never leave my side.

I walk up and it's just 7 in the morning. I almost forgot the day today but after I look at my phone, I saw that today is the day I was born.

My sister is not at home since she and her husband are celebrating their 3rd anniversary. But her absence didn't become a hindrance for her to celebrate my day. I received a video message from her at exactly 12 am. In that video, she and her husband greeted me with a smile. My sister was holding a cake as they both sang happy birthday. Both of them also said a long message after they sing. Before the video ended, my sister reminds me to take care and always stay safe.

Since this is a great way to start my day, I go out of my room with a smile on my face. When I got down the stairs, I saw Hinata in the kitchen. He's talking to someone on his phone and he looks so serious.

"Goodmorning." I greeted him with a low voice because it looks like he's talking about something important and I don't want to interrupt him.

He nods to me as an answer. A minute or two later, he hung up the phone then sighs.

"What's the problem?" I ask.

"I'm so lazy to do anything today but apparently, someone sends me an errand to do"

I don't know why but I suddenly felt my heart ached. I suddenly become angry with undefined reason at all so I choose not to say anything.

"I'm sorry I have to leave you alone. I might be able to go home tomorrow."

"Okay. Take care."

"You too" my eyes follow his direction as he goes out of the house. I stare at the door for about 10 minutes hoping he'll come back and say it's just a prank but he did not.

I usually don't get very disappointed when someone forgets my birthday so I don't know why I feel this way. I don't know how to explain my emotion right now but I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm frustrated, I'm confused, and much more emotion building up. It sucks. The happiness I felt when I woke up completely vanished.

* * *

It's already 6 in the evening and all I do in the entire 11 hours of my birthday is to lay at my bed and listen to some music. I also didn't eat anything aside from ramen because I don't have any appetite at all. I thought this year will be different from those previous years of my birthday but I'm wrong. I shouldn't expect anything. I shouldn't expect that I can celebrate my day with him.

When I was about to sleep, I feel that my door is slowly opening. After I open my eyes, all suddenly became dark. I feel someone's presence inside my room but I can't see anything.

"Who's there? I know I'm not alone in this room now." I calmly said. I didn't move even an inch but I try to find a useful thing near me.

When I finally grabbed a weapon, I was about to stand up but the light suddenly turns on. It is so bright that I have to close my eyes again. What the hell is going on?

"Happy birthday to you~"  
"Happy birthday to you~" "Happy birthday, Happy birthday~" "Happy birthday Tobio~"  


I slowly open my eyes. The lights still shine so brightly but what's in front of me was brighter.

In front of me, there's a tangerine standing while holding a cake and balloons. He's also smiling from ear to ear. His eyes are much brighter than the sun. This whole tangerine is the brightest thing I see in my entire life.

"Hey! Blow the candle! Don't just stare at me. It's very heavy you know." I snapped out into reality when I heard his voice. I didn't even notice that I was staring at him. What the fuck are you doing Kageyama Tobio?

I blow the candle at the cake and drag the chair beside my bed so he can place the cake there. After he put the cake on the chair, he let go of the balloons and then he sat on my bed.

"Happy 19th birthday!" he said while clapping. I can't help but to smile. He's so adorable. I want to hug him.

"I thought you have an errand to do and you're coming home tomorrow?"

"Ohh, that's was just a lie. Why would I leave on your special day?"

"But you just leave. You left me alone for 11 hours." he laughs. I'm trying to act mad but I can't.

"It's hard to find a perfect gift you know?"

"But you're existence is the perfect gift I can receive." we stare for about a minute when he suddenly looks away. I kinda feel bad because I might have made the atmosphere awkward.

"I'm sorry if I made you feel uncom-" I haven't finished talking yet but he purposely interrupts me. 

"I will not exist forever, Kageyama. Everything has its own time limit."

"What do you mean by that?"

He smile, ignoring my question, he said, "Nevermind what I have just said. Let's just celebrate your birthday shall we?"

I didn't exactly get what he means but it hurts me. It feels like reality just slaps me. I wish I was just overthinking again.

* * *

After eating, we watch some movies in my room. We also play games and as usual, he talks a lot. It's just the 2 of us but I can't wish for anything more. He beside me is more than enough.

"It's already 11 in the evening, it's almost already midnight!" he said while we're playing pillow fight.

"Why are you so shocked? Is this already late for your bedtime?" I jokingly ask.

"Are you an idiot? What am I? A kid?"

"No, but you look like a kid." he suddenly struck me with the pillow he's holding, and I didn't have time to dodge so it hits my face. "Deserved."

"I was just joking, little tangerine."

"I know." he extends his hand to help me get up so I did hold his hands, unfortunately, I'm much stronger than him which causes him to fall at top of me.

His face is so close to mine. I can feel his breath on my lip and his eyes slowly absorbing me.

I don't know what to react but that position didn't stay long because he suddenly get up and look away.

"I-I'm so sorry. I'm weak." I stand up as he talks.

"No, I'm the one who would say sorry. I put too much weight on you. I'm sorry."

"L-let's go before this day ends. I-I still want to show you something." he said as he quickly gets out of my room. I can't help but to smile. His face was all red, he looks so cute. I don't know if it's good for my heart or not.

I stay behind his back as I follow him. He obviously walking fast so I won't catch up on him so I maintain a space for us. I'm still smiling like an idiot, am I sick or what?

He goes out to the veranda and climbs to our roof. I haven't try to climb there until today.

He lay down and look at the stars so I did the same thing. None of us try to talk but I can say that we're both smiling like an idiot. The atmosphere isn't awkward at all, it is honestly calming and relaxing.

I decide to broke the silence between us when I say, "What are we doing here?"

"Let's just enjoy this day before it ends shall we?"

"But it's already 11:33, I thought you buy me a gift that's why you returned late?"

"But you said that my existence is enough for you?" he said without still looking at me.

"Yeah, it's more than enough."

"You're so corny." he said as he chuckles.

He suddenly sits up so do I. He suddenly looks at me which gave me a slight shock.

"I'm surprised"

"Do you want to remember me, Kageyama?" I frowned because of what he said.

"Of course. What kind of question is that?"

"Even though I'm done existing in this world?" he asks again ignoring my question.

"What the hell Hinata? Are you dying? Is the real reason why you're late because you go to your doctor?"

"I'm not dying, dumbass." he said while laughing. How can he laugh while I feel so hurt?

"Then why are you asking that stupid questions? I'm confused." I said frustratedly.

"Because everything has its end. And when that day comes, we both need to accept it."

"I don't understand you. I don't want to understand. Why are you saying things like that? Are you going to leave me too like my mother? I thought you will never leave me."

I look away from him because I can feel that my eyes are about to drop the waters. I don't want him to see me cry because I don't accept to understand anything.

I suddenly feel a warm thing on my cheeks. It is his hand. He's holding both of my cheeks as he moves my head so I can face him.

"Please don't cry. I won't ever leave you Kageyama. Even if I'm with your side or not, I will never leave you so please, stop overthinking and answer my first question with yes or no. Do you want to remember me?"

"Yes."

He smiles as he gets something in his pocket. There I saw a blue small backs with a card. In that card was written my name and his name with a happy face.

I reached out for the box and open it. There I saw a blue braided bracelet with a tangerine pendant.

"There are so many reasons why I choose the color blue. Except that that's the color that reminds me of you, it has a lot of meaning. With that, you will never ever forget me."

"I don't have any intention to forget you, my little tangerine. With or without this bracelet, I will never ever forget you."

"I know, but I still want to give you a gift. It's your birthday after all."

"Thank you for this. I'll give you one too at your birthday.

"I'll wait for that. Happy birthday again, Kageyama Tobio, my blueberry."

"Don't you dare leave me."

"I won't leave you."

* * *

Hours become days, days become weeks, and weeks become months. I can't still fully believed that almost everything around me has changed. Suddenly, my life isn't the same as before, and that's because of the person who never leaves my side.

Since it is already summer vacation, I don't have any classes. My sister and her husband are not here as usual because they're invited to a couple party. Before, I usually feel sad if they're leaving me behind but as I said earlier, many things changed already.

"Kageyama, what do you want to eat?" I heard Hinata ask.

"Anything is fine." I lazily said.

"I'm not in the mood to cook anything today. Can you cook for us?" he asked as he sits beside me.

"I'm not in the mood too, my little tangerine." both of us laugh because of our laziness.

"Let's just order food shall we?" he asks and I nod as I pinch his nose.

"Why are you so cute?"

"I know right?" and we both laugh again. This is our everyday scenario and I'm fine with it. Being each other company is more than being fine.

We spend the whole day talking, watching, and playing. We look like a kid instead of a more grown out individual.

While we're playing some board game, my phone vibrates. After I look at my phone, I see my sister's calling me.

"Who's calling?" Hinata asks. I look at him and I saw him trying to peek at my phone.

"It's my sister. I'll just answer it." He nods so I get up and walk towards the balcony.

[Hey! Why do you call?]

_[How are you? Is everything fine there?]_

[Yeah, everything's fine. You don't have to worry. Why do you call?]

_[You eat already?]_

[Yeah. Why do you call?] I suddenly heard her laugh.

_[Okay, I'll get straight to the point because it looks like I'm interrupting you. Wanna go on vacation tomorrow?]_

[Why so suddenly?]

[Because I missed my Tobio already. Since Hinata came to our house, you forget about your sister. I'm so jealous.]

[Wait, what? You're serious?]

 _[No. I'm just kidding.]_ she said then laugh. _[I'm actually very thankful to Hinata. When he came into our lives, my little brother changes so much. From being grumpy and a living dead to a happier and more lively man. You're not a baby anymore.]_

[You just realized that?]

_[Yup! Because in my eyes, you're still the Tobio I know who's a baby who likes to drink a lot of milk.]_

[Stop it, you sound like mom. I still want to drink milk though, but I'm not a baby anymore! For God's sake, I'm 19 years old, turning 20 this year.]

_[Yeah, whatever. But about the vacation tomorrow, we can bring Hinata with us since he's the reason behind all your changes.]_

[If that's the case then we're coming.]

_[Huhu, you're really a man now.]_

[I said stop it already.]

_"We're going to pick up you guys at 8. Make sure you'll wake up.]_

[I will.]

_[Bye, take care.]_

[Bye. Take care too.]

As soon as my sister end up the call, I get back to my room. I'm not yet completely inside my room but I already see Hinata who's peacefully sleeping in my bed.

I slowly closed the door to my room and quietly walk towards my bed. I sit on the side of the bed as I stare at his face.

"Why are you like that? If being cute is a crime, you're going to jail forever." I fixed the blanket so he will not catch a cold.

"Thank you for not leaving my side, little tangerine. You don't know how grateful I am to meet you. Don't worry, I'll never ever leave your side. See this bracelet you gave me? Even this thing looks so girly, I will never remove this from my wrist. I'll never forget you even this world already ends."

I brought my face closer to him and kiss his forehead. "Rest my tangerine, I will stay by your side."

I lie down beside him and hug him tight. No matter what happens, I will never let go of you.

* * *

Before I completely wake up, I can feel the heat on my forehead. Light also enters my eyes even though they were close.

I blink 3 times before I completely open it. After my vision went clear, I saw Hinata's face 12 inches away above me.

"Goodmorning!" he said with a large smile on his face.

I thought it was the real sun who's giving light to my eyes but it's really this ball of sunshine who's giving light not just only to my closed eyes.

"Goodmorning." I also said with a smile.

I sat on the bed and stare at my door. I'm still half asleep not until Hinata talks again.

"You're sister and her husband are downstairs. They're asking if you're already awake so I have no choice but to wake you up."

That's the only time that I realized what me and my sister talk about yesterday. I look at the clock on my phone and I saw that it's already 9 in the morning.

"Oh shit! I overslept." I quickly get out of my bed and pack my things. I can see in my peripheral vision the confused look on Hinata's face. Shit! I also forgot to tell him.

"Hey? Why you're suddenly in a hurry? Is there anything wrong?"

"My sister said that we're going on a vacation. I can't tell you last night because you're already sleeping and I don't want to bother you. I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to say sorry but you need to calm down. Look at what you're packing. It is just a bunch of underwear." I look at the bag where I'm putting my clothes and he's right, it's full of underwear.

"Your sister said that we're going to leave at exactly 10 so you still have time. Calm down." I just sigh. I also don't know why I'm suddenly in a hurry.

* * *

We leave the house at exactly 10, just like what my sister said to Hinata. She said that we're staying there for 3 days and 2 nights. Hinata looks so excited because he said that he really wants to swims.

"You sure know how to swim? I think there's no kiddie pool there." I said jokingly but with a serious tone.

"So what are you trying to say, Mr. Kageyama Tobio?"

"Nothing. I just want to share with you that info so you wouldn't drown." I'm so shocked when he suddenly hit my head. It's weak but still, I'm shocked.

"You're clearly saying that I'm too small to an adult pool."

"Oho! I'm not the one who said that."

"Stop fighting back there. There's no pool in there, it's a beach." my sister suddenly interrupt as.

"Miwa's right. You don't need to fight because we know that you'll never leave each other side.

I can suddenly feel my cheeks are burning so I quickly look away from them. I fake looking at the car's window so they won't notice.

"You're blushing Hinata?" I suddenly look at them again because of what my sister has said and there I saw Hinata's face all red.

"No! I'm not!"

"You're clearly not." he suddenly looks at me after I talk and after he confirmed that I'm really looking at him, he rolled his eyes then averted my gaze. I just shake my head and smile as I look at the car's window again. How adorable my tangerine.

* * *

We reached our destination at 12 so after we put our things in our room, the four of us headed to the restaurant of the resort. It's big and everything looks so expensive.

"Kageyama look! The sand is so white!" Hinata cheerfully said as he points to the beach.

"Yeah. I might burry you there later, I don't know."

"So mean!"

"What the both of you are still doing here? Aren't you hungry yet?" my sister asks.

Both of us didn't say a word as we sit on the chair. I can feel his deathly glare beside me so I just laugh.

After we eat, we stay in the room for at least 30 minutes then we go outside for some activity. My sister and her husband separate from us so it's just me and the little tangerine again.

"Look!" Hinata suddenly shouts so I look at him. I was surprised when he suddenly threw me the sand. Good thing it didn't hit my face.

"Hinata Shoyo!" I shout as I grabbed sand to throw at him too. He suddenly starts to scream and laugh as we go around the place. I end up carrying him and throwing him at the sea. I laugh so hard after I see his hilarious reaction.

"It hurts you dumbass!"

"No. You're the dumbass here." we started running and laughing again around the place. I didn't realize that I'm not actually thinking of what people will think if they see me like this. Honestly, I don't care about it anymore. As long as I can see Hinata's smile, everything's already fine.

* * *

The next day was the same as yesterday. My sister and her husband separate from us then me and Hinata are just enjoying the rest of the day.

It's 10 in the evening but we decided to stay at the beach until midnight. The air is so cold and the whole area is calming. You can hear the waves of the sea because of how quiet the place is.

We stay like that for a minute before I start talking.

"How many months do I know you already?" I saw him look at me but I didn't look away from the sea.

"Hmm. I met you in December and it's already May. If I'm correct, it's already 5 months?" I nod repeatedly. "Why do you ask?"

"Just want to know how months already past since my life start to change." I heard him laugh so I look at him. "Why you're laughing?"

"Nothing. You're just so corny."

"Whatever."

A minute of silence covers the entire place again. I was about to talk so he is.

"Kageyama"

"Hey."

Both of us look at each other then we both suddenly laugh. I don't know what's funny but yeah, we laugh.

"What?" I ask while still laughing.

"No. You first."

"No, you go first since you talk first."

"No, we both talk at the same time. You go first."

"Fine." I get the box behind me and then give it to him.

"What's this? A gift? It isn't my birthday yet you know."

"I know, but just open it."

I didn't remove my eyes from his face so I can see his reaction as he opens the box. I'm expecting him to smile or show some happy gesture but all I saw is his teary eyes.

"W-why? You don't l-like it? Why are you sad?" I disconcertedly ask him. His tear suddenly falls which makes my heart hurt.

"Why you're crying? Is everything okay? You don't like it? You're tired? What? Please tell me."

"No. I like it very much Tobio. I like it very much." he said as he removes the ring from the box. It's just a simple gold ring, no design.

"Then why are you crying? I can see in your eyes that it's not tears of joy. You're hurt. You're sad. Why? Please tell me."

"Thank you for this, Kageyama. Thank you."

"Why Hinata? Are you expecting that it's the same bracelet that you gave me? Don't worry, I'll give you that on your birthday."

"It's fine, Kageyama. Everything is fine as long as it's from you."

"Then why? Why Hinata? Why you're suddenly hurt? We're both happy earlier right? Why?"

"Because you need to wake u!" he said while wiping his neverending tears.

"What are you saying? I'm awake. I'm awake Hinata. Can't you see?"

"Yes you're awake, you're awake in a world that doesn't really exist"

I confusedly look at him as tears suddenly fall from my eyes.

"Here you go again Hinata. You suddenly spitting nonsense again. Are you tired? Let's go back to our room now." I said as I stand up. I was about to walk away but he suddenly holds my hands which cause me to stop.

"Please Kageyama, you need to wake up to your reality. This isn't your reality."

"Can you please stop? I don't want to hear any more of your nonsense. This is the reality, Hinata. Stop confusing me!" I heard him cry more which make me also to cry more.

"Kageyama. Please stop too."

I go back to where I sit earlier. I stare at the see as my tears fall continuously.

"I know you don't understand anything but I know that you also have an idea of what am I talking about. This is not a world for you. This is not where you belong."

"Hinata..."

"You need to wake up, my blueberry. Your sister is waiting for you. She's very worried about you."

"But I'm awake. I'm awake Hinata and my sister is just sleeping in our room."

"Shh, don't cry." he said as he wipes my tears. We both can stop crying like an idiot.

"Why everything suddenly turns into this? We both just laughing earlier right?"

"Because it's almost 6 months Kageyama, it's almost 6 months when that truck hits you."

"W-what truck? What hits me?"

"You'll understand once you wake up." he suddenly stands with a smile on his face but tears continue to fall from his eyes.

"Why are you pushing me to wake up when I'm already awake?!"

He suddenly walks back towards the sea with his body still facing me. His smile doesn't fade and his tears keep falling. I try to stand up so I can follow him but my legs were too weak.

"Hinata Shoyo! Where are you going? I thought you'll never leave me?" I shout as loud as I can. I can feel like there are some spikes on my throat but I ignore it.

"I will never leave you! Just look at that bracelet and you'll remember me!" he also shouted back.

"I still don't understand everything but please don't leave. You're everything to me... You changed me. You're all I need. Please. Please Hinata Shoyo, don't leave."

"Wake up. I love you"

* * *

I slowly open my eyes and a very bright light greet me. Even though it hurts my eyes, I didn't close my eyes nor blink.

"Tobio? Can you hear me? You're really awake?" I look to my left and there I saw my sister and her husband. Her eyes were so puffy which means she cries a lot.

"Oh my God! My Tobio is really awake! Call the doctors, hon!" I saw how quickly his husband move. I just stare at her as she hugs me. I don't know what's going on or what's happening.

* * *

"Can you talk? If you can't just nod." the doctor said.

"I can talk, doc." I said. I see how my sister and the nurses react. They look so happy and grateful.

"What's the last thing you can remember?" the doctor as again. I try to remember anything I can remember.

"Wake up." I see the confused look all over their face.

"Wake up?"

"That's the last thing I can remember. Someone saying me to wake up. Am I awake?" I look at my sister and she nods repeatedly. I still can't understand why she's crying.

"Yes Tobio, you're awake. You're finally awake."

They all go out of the room after the doctor finished asking me some questions. I keep looking around but I can't remember why am I at the hospital and why is my sister crying. I also can't remember who told me to wake up.

I try to stand up but my legs were too weak. I try to look anything around the room and there's one thing that catches my attention, the blue bracelet with a tangerine pendant on my wrist.

"Tobio? Why are you crying? Are you hurt?"

I didn't notice that my sister is already here in my room. I can't remove my eyes at the bracelet on my wrist. I also don't know why my tears suddenly began to fall.

"Where did I get this?" I ask my sister without looking away at the bracelet.

"That bracelet? Your grandpa give you that since you're a kid. You don't remember?" she asks and I shook my head.

"Why blue? Why tangerine?"

"I don't know why is it blue or why is it tangerine. You're the only person who knows about it because you're the one who chooses it."

I quickly look at my sister before looking back at the bracelet.

Is it really me who chooses this? Why does my mind say that the person who told me to wake up and the person who gave me this is the same? But fuck, I can't remember anything.

"Rest now, Tobio. Don't force yourself to remember anything. The doctor said that you'll gradually regain your memory."

* * *

It's been a year since I woke up from 6 months coma. I started to remember everything after a week I woke up. I started to remember everything about him

I'm peacefully walking here at the park in our city. In my position here, I can clearly see where that truck who brings me to him hit me. I can help but smile even though that causes me to almost die.

"Kageyama!"

I look around and there I saw Sugawara's walking towards me while waving his hands. I smile at him and also wave back.

We sat on one of the benches here as we look around the people here.

"You're always here. Since the day you get out of the hospital you're always going here."

"Yeah. Just a habit." he looked at me confusedly so I raise my brows. "What?"

"You're just going here once a month before that incident happen." I blink many times as I realized that it's true.

"Yeah? Sorry."

"You know what? Since the day that you wake up in a coma, you completely like a different person. You start to smile, to be more lively and what's more surprising is that you start socializing. Are you sure you're still the Kageyama I know? You're not some sort of different spirit?" I laugh at Suga's statement.

"It's me Suga, it's the Kageyama Tobio you know.

"You sure?"

"100%" we both starting laughing together.

Our conversation interrupted when he suddenly stood up because he sees the man he's waiting for approaching us.

"Daichi's here. Take care Kageyama, may you find your special someone too."

"How many times do I have to tell you that I already found him?" I said followed by a chuckle.

"Until you introduce him to me. We're going now. Bye."

"Bye."

I look at them as they completely vanished at my sight. I sit back at the bench again as I look around the place.

"We're always hanging out here, my little tangerine."

At first, there's a lot of question I want to be answered like _how do people sees me_. I still have a lot of question that I want to answer but it changed to; _how can I see you again?_ _are you here beside me?_ _can you see me?_ and lastly, _do you never really existed?_

I smile as I think about those questions. I smile as I think about the times we spent together whether it really happens or not.

I stare at the bracelet you gave me.

I know you're here with me because you said you'll never leave me. Either I can see you or not, I don't care because you're here in my heart.

I have a lot of things that I regret. I regret that I didn't say what you are to me. I regret that I didn't say _I love you_. I regret that I didn't say how much I love you. But deep inside I know that you know those things.

You're the first person, besides my family, who talks to me. You're the first person who made me feel that I'm a human too. You're the first person who made me realize that there's happiness in everything. You're the first person who accepts me on who I am. You're the first person who never leaves my side. And you're the first who loves me. Thank you.

I'm awake now, Hinata Shoyo. Where are you?

###### THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is ryzenxhie again. If you reach this end, thank you thank you very much. I can't express how grateful I am to know that you finish reading this story of mine. I believe that I can write but I think I don't have such talent. Please comment your thoughts about this story or even about me. I'll gladly accept and understand it because I really need your opinion. I hope you enjoy reading this hehe. I know we kinda relate to this because we also love those who are not really existing in this world we're livin'. I honestly based the story on people who love what we can't have. So, enough chatter. Thank you once again for reading this. Please say something about it, I really need to know if I should continue writing or I should stop. Thank you! Love you all.


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